Group’s new Nov/Dec 2010 magazine is out and I really enjoyed reading through it. Here are some of my thoughts from it:

Something I liked: I’m a big fan of building trust with people – parents in particular. Doug Ashley’s – Got Trust? – Parent article was simply awesome. He shares 3 crucial details to help build trust with parents that I think every middle school guy/gal needs to hear and do.

???: I had a hard time reading through Brandon Kennard’s article – Students who lead/Adults who mentor. I couldn’t see how his four key ideas applied in my context. I totally agree with him that our students can do a lot of leading but in middle school ministry the need for our adult leaders to be mentoring and leading I believe has to happen for us to be effective.

Key Statement: The Sep/Oct 2010 magazine Duffy Robbins had a great statement and he had another really good one this time, “Getting kids to show up without helping them grow up is catching fish, and then letting them rot in the boat.”

Creative idea: Stephanie Caro’s – More than Christmas article had some very creative ideas. I really liked her idea to have “A New Year’s Edge” meeting for New Year’s.

posted by Scott Rubin

Seems like I could always use a few more volunteers in our middle school ministry… how about you?  So I feel like I’ve got to keep my eyes open wide for someone who might be one invite away from a great ministry experience!

I’ve got this friend named Andy.
He’s a sharp young married guy who goes to our church, and has a preschool daughter. We were casually talking at church a couple months ago, and he asked something about our middle school ministry. I mentioned that we still needed more guys to lead small groups (does anyone else seem to have more willing girl-leaders than guy-leaders?). And Andy says something like “My wife told me once that she thought I’d be good at something like that…”

My ears perked up. “Very innnnteresting, Andy!” (I know this guy’s integrity, his love for Jesus, and I can tell that he’s the kind of person that could understand middle schoolers.) So — I made an invite.

“Andy, you should come out some weekend, even once… just see what we do! I can connect you up with one of our great volunteers; you can follow him around for the day & see what it’s all about. No promises, no commitments… just come kick the tires and check it out, huh?” He didn’t say “Yes”…. But he didn’t say “No”, either! So I knew there was a chance.

Time passed. I’d see him in the hallway at church … and he’d duck behind someone else, [...]

Continue Reading “He didn’t say Yes… but he didn’t say No, either.”

Posted by Kurt Johnston

“When in doubt, gas it out”.  Those were the first words of advice a friend gave me when my family started riding dirt bikes a few years ago.  The idea is that when riding in the desert, should you find yourself in trouble the best course of action is usually to hit the gas.  Going up a hill that suddenly seems too steep?  Gas it out!  Approaching a drop-off and don’t have time to slow down safely?  Gas it out!  In a sand wash?  Gas it out!  Although the concept is counter-intuitive when on a motorcycle, it is actually the best course of action most of the time because the process of hitting the gas causes the bike to straighten out, gain traction etc. which usually helps you avoid disaster. Hitting the breaks or slowing down, however, can often have adverse consequences….the very consequence you are hoping to avoid.

As a guy who enjoys a fair amount of speed and risk taking, the advice made total sense and has been pretty easy for me to follow.  It is GREAT advice for dirt bike riding.  However, it is TERRIBLE advice for life.

Life….especially ministry life…is a fast-paced adventure filled with unseen drop-offs, hills to climb and sand washes.  And human nature (in varying degrees depending on your personality) is usually to “gas it out” in hopes that we can simply power our way through the challenges we face.  Hitting the gas in the midst of challenges can feel right because it helps [...]

Continue Reading ““When In Doubt, Gas It Out” (good advice for dirtbiking, but not for life)”

Posted By Kurt Johnston-

- Wow, this is AWESOME.

- I don’t watch The Amazing Race, so knew nothing about this unbelievable incident.  wow!

- We are trying something different in our junior high services this weekend:  The entire lesson will be taught as a bit/skit using two primary characters.  The lesson topic is “How To Be Healthy” (focusing on a healthy heart, mind and body…obviously focusing on inward/spiritual health more than physical). Our “teachers” are a goofy basketball player and his coach. Should be really fun.

- Are you going to SYMC?  It really is an amazing conference and, to my knowledge, offers more junior high specific workshops and resources than any conference out there.  Join us!

- Looking for a cool one-day service project/event for your junior highers?  Check out 1 by youth.  I’ll blog more about this fantastic opportunity in the near future.

- Know of a church looking for a full-time junior high pastor?  A buddy of mine is in transition and could be a great fit!

I get the privilege and opportunity to be in a church that embraces change. This embrace is healthy and useful in helping the people of New Covenant Bible Church fulfill what Paul said to us in Eph 4:12, “to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up (NIV).” The book Switch helped me put into words some of the things that we are already doing. There are 3 key characters in the book: the Rider, the Elephant, & the Path. Each character had a lot of great ideas for me to think on but I’ll limit my thoughts to one key idea from each.

The Rider is the brain behind any change. It has the ability to understand what needs to occur for change to happen. But it is very limited in its ability to make the Elephant move in the direction the Rider thinks is best. The key idea I got from this character is that as a leader of my church I need to help my people make a change by giving them, in detail, the way to go about change. As the Heath brothers put it, “To make a switch, you need to script the critical moves.” I need to show them “bright spots” on the journey to change so that they can see, step-by-step, how things are progressing and how their abilities to slowly change is making a difference.

The Elephant is the huge emotions behind (and sometimes [...]

Continue Reading “Book Report: Switch by Chip Heath & Dan Heath”

I’ve got my own parking space!

Well, sort of. It’s not like there’s a sign on it that says “reserved for middle school pastor”… it’s more like I just claimed it for myself. See – there’s not a lot of competition for this particular parking spot. It’s waaay in the back of the church lot, but even though I get there before most people on weekends, I like to park back there. Sure, I’ve skipped this a few times when it’s pouring rain, or when there’s a foot of snow.     But not usually.

Mostly because it gives me an extra minute or 2 to THINK about who’ll be walking in the door of our youth ministry that weekend.

- The “new kid”, who’s never come to our middle school ministry before, and is wondering if anyone will talk to them.
- The kid who just got in a fight with his parents on the car ride to church, and doesn’t feel like being there at all.
- The kid who’s fired up about hearing something from God!
- The kid who’s wandered off God’s path that week, and is wondering how God’s feeling about them.

Before I started parking in the back, I’d usually bolt out of my car & into the church, ready to attack all that was ahead of me. But this little habit has helped me to more intentionally ask God’s guidance on my [...]

Continue Reading “My Reserved Parking Space”

Uber: Very; really; extremely; over-the-top

For the past year or so I have struggled to put into words….into a clearly defined category….a certain type of parent(s). And, I’m not sure if I am identifying a personality type, a parenting style, or something else.  I just know it exists, and I believe it is on the rise and is going to do long-term harm.  The condition: Uber-parenting.

Let me define an “Uber-parent”:  An Uber-parent is a parent who, either strategically or unknowingly, is overly active, overly concerned, overly involved in virtually every aspect of their child’s existence.  Uber-parents call the school and demand an explanation or give an excuse when their child scores poorly on a test. Uber-parents pull the soccer coach aside and explain in no uncertain terms why their child should never have to play goalie (or should always play goalie). Uber-parents sign their child up for camp a month late and then demand that the church create room. Uber-parents coddle, excuse, pamper, baby etc. They feel their child is entitled to special treatment. Uber-parents want, at all costs, to prevent their child from experiencing disappointment, hurt, failure etc.

- Uber-parents love their children and have good intentions. But the road to destruction is often paved with good intentions.

- Key candidates for Uber-parenting:  White, upper-middle class families; single parents; absentee dads who make up for their lack of ongoing presence by Uber-parenting to make up for lost time; home school parents.

Let’s hear your thoughts on this.  Am I onto something?  Am I [...]

Continue Reading “The Rise Of The Uber-Parents”

posted by Scott Rubin

This weekend we’re doing one of those “invite your friend” weekends in our jr. high ministry. Over the last month we did a series called “Epidemic”, about how the gospel spreads. We’re praying and hoping that students’ friends will come to our gathering, and find a place that they’d be interested in returning to.

So – right smack in the middle of it, my buddy Wes and I are giving a super-short “talk” – and the content is basically “4 things we want 1st-timers to know”.

1- God is crazy about middle schoolers!
We’re sure of that, because God’s nuts about all people. Jr. Highers included!

2- The Bible is not a “normal” book.
Not like a school book. Not like a “Twilight” novel. But awe-inspiring, amazing words straight from God, to us.

3- Deep friendships make life better.
That’s why we do so much in small groups. Friends who really know you & support you are vital.

4- We like FUN.
Sometimes laughing & crazy fun hits the mark like nothing else.

I wonder what you’d add… or change… or improve?

Posted By Jared Moine

WHAT NOT TO DO

I learned this past weekend a good life lesson. When considering a prize for the winner of a junior high game, never-ever pick a yo-yo ball. What seemed like a great prize to award to the winner of a game quickly turned into a terrible decision. My problem… the game was won by a 6^th grade boy who was sitting in the front row. You might be thinking, “Well what’s the big deal?” Well this 6^th grader proceeded to play with the yo-yo ball throughout every word of our twenty three minute lesson. Every word… Right in the front… the whole time! If I made eye contact with him he would stop but as soon as I moved on to the rest of the room he went right back to yo-yo balling it up. I didn’t have the guts to call him out because he’s a great 6^th grader in our ministry and I knew it would just crush him to be embarrassed like that, so I just pushed through.

Lesson learned… say no to the yo-yo ball.

You know how you hear people talk about an event, or a conference, in SUPERLATIVE terms… but you suspect that it’s because it’s “their deal”, and they’re just trying to pump the attendance?

Well, a few years ago, my friend Johnny Scott kept telling me about Jr. High Believe, and how his team had done EVERYTHING they could think of to make this a fabulous middle-schooler-friendly event. Well, even though I trust Johnny, in the back of my mind I couldn’t help but think, “you’re supposed to say that, dude. It’s YOUR event!”

But then, I decided to visit a weekend. I’ll be honest… the first one I went to, I didn’t bring any of my students with me. You can call me a skeptic – but I wanted to see it first!

And what I saw… was FABULOUS. They packed the weekend with super-fun-jr-high targeted stuff. They have high energy worship, and thought-provoking moments. They have Bible teaching that’s hits the bullseye for middle schoolers. I was super impressed.

And maybe the best part of it for me….  when I took students for the first time, is that I was freed up just to BE with them. to Hear them. to Hang with them.

So if you’re looking for a great event to bring your middle schoolers to –  check out BELEIVE. Even if you’re a skeptic.