How To Win Friends And Influence People

Kurt on July 10th, 2009

I’ve never read the book, so I have no idea what advice it gives but the other day I was thinking about some of my friends who have had the greatest influence on me in recent years and why that is. I thought it might be fun to pass along some of things about them that are (at least I hope) beginning to rub off on me.

The Ability To Ask Good Follow-Up Questions.  I have a couple of friends who are great at digging a little deeper, asking a question that brings the real issue to the surface etc. The ability to ask good follow up questions makes conversation rich and makes people feel valued and important.

The Ability To “Stop Time”. I have a friend who is extremely busy and everybody knows it. Yet when he stops to talk to you, even in a spontaneous hallway encounter, it’s as if time stops and you become the sole focus of his attention. There aren’t many things that make me feel better than when somebody who is obviously super busy can hit the pause button and make it seem as if they have nothing better to do than talk to me.

The Ability To Prop Up.  One of my lifelong friends is the master of encouragement. I honestly can’t remember ever spending time with him, whether it was 5 minutes or 5 hours, without walking away at the end of our time together feeling better about myself.

The Ability To Inspire. I love being around inspiring people. I have a buddy who is constantly dreaming of a new idea, a better way, a bigger opportunity etc.

If you have never done so, I’d encourage you to think about some of your friends and other people who have had great impact on you. What is it about them that you appreciate? What do you see in them that you need to let rub off on you and your relationships with others.

Related posts:

  1. The Power Of Junior High Friends
  2. A Short Tribute
  3. Random Randomness
  4. Systematic Relationships
  5. Encouragement

Share Discuss (3)

rob at 9:55pm July 10

its a great book- especially for middle schooers or high schoolers. great for basic leadership training

Qualities of Key Influencers « More Than DodgeBall at 11:19pm July 10

[...] has a great post about some of the characteristics of influencers in his life. I really dug the 4 abilities he talks about as people who shape him – here’s 2 of [...]

Blane Young at 10:36am July 11

I am halfway through the book and it is incredible! I recommend it for anyone in ministry! It earns a rating of 4.8 burritos! (out of 5 of course)…